The Match

It happened. It finally happened. Nic and I have been chosen to adopt a baby and we are more than excited. The story (sorry, it's a little long):

As you are all aware, we started the adoption process three years ago. As some of you know, I struggled with my faith and being at peace with this trial since 2006. Though, honestly, the last two years have really been the best for me and the last four months of 2010 really pushed me to my limits. . .of faith that is.

I knew I, personally, needed more faith in my life. But it was hard. I felt like I was doing everything right, though in the back of my mind I knew I still wasn't making the ultimate sacrifice: surrendering everything to the Lord. August 2010, I was compelled to be humbled and turn my faith to the Lord. Trusting that He would provide for Nic and I. It was still hard, but I (we) had done everything we could and it just wasn't up to us anymore. Nic an I came to know that in the end everything would work out and this sacrifice would allow us to have our family.

Now fast forward to December 2010. We felt we needed to really do better on our end to make sure our family happened (we were also compelled again by a letter from LDSFS). We took the necessary steps. Some were long and hard (more paperwork-blah!), while others were easy. We were hit with some speed bumps, but we continued on. We did everything in faith. I personally know that I was doing more things on my end to show the Lord I was faithful. It was a rewarding experience.

January 2011, Nic and I decide to come up with a family theme: "Trust God and believe in good things to come." It seemed fitting for the hopes we had for our family with the new year. Thursday, January 27th Nic and I went to the temple. We hadn't been in a while so it felt good to be there. The temple greeter asked us to participate in a sealing session and we were more than happy too. Before we began our session, I wrote down a list of people I felt needed prayers and placed in the prayer box. On that list I wrote "Ward Birth Mom." We hadn't prayed for her in a while, so it felt good writing her "name" down. Sitting in the sealing room, I was filled with peace and hope. The hope of being able to return there with our future children. With the additional paper work, I had dragged my feet a little, but then finally on Saturday, January 29th I bit the bullet and pushed through it. Monday, January 31st I emailed everything to our case worker. Tuesday, February 1st I got a call.

It was a friend from our old ward wondering if Nic and I were still hoping to adopt. I told her we were and she asked if she could share our information with a family friend. Of course I said yes, but honestly I really didn't think anything would come of it. We had two previous situations come up, but nothing came of them. I wasn't putting all of my eggs in this basket. A few hours later my friend called back, stating that the Birth Mother (BM) was wanting to move forward(!) and gave me her attorney's contact information so we could schedule an appointment with him. I was a little in shock and in somewhat disbelief. I couldn't believe it was that "easy." I think mostly in my mind I had made it into this huge spiritual experience (but looking back, it really was), and so the fact that it wasn't was kind'a a downer for me. But I was happy. Just in complete disbelief. I call the attorney and he tells me that his client (BM) wants to meet us. I call our mutual friend and we get it arranged. I begin reaching out to my friends in the adoption community, because, in all honesty I. AM. FREAKING(!). OUT!!!! They all just reminded me to "breathe". Really? Easier said than done people.

We meet at our mutual friends house and while the conversations were a little awkward at the beginning (think first date/blind date), we soon found our common ground: shoes!!! Once we began talking about shoes, it was like we had been friends forever :) At the end of the night, as she was leaving, she told us: "As far as I'm concerned, the baby is already yours." I had to give Nic's had a little squeeze and steady myself from not wanting to jump on her and give her way too many hugs (though, she has been endearing enough to deal with me when I want to give her a hug. she understands I'm a hugger).

Our sweet BM feels like family already. And she will be. She IS family. We have all decided on an open adoption. She said she never wants to step on our toes or interfere with our parenting styles. I told her that I don't ever want her to feel as if we are being "too open" with her. I told her as long as we keep communicating what we are and aren't comfortable with and as long as we are honest with each other, this relationship (like any relationship) will work.

There are some details that still need to be worked out: mostly, deciding on an attorney. Her attorney said all communication (post placement) would have to go through him "because we don't want birth mom knowing where you live." Um, for reals dude? That's old school and considered closed adoption. Not for us.

The count down to July 17th has begun!

P.S. The sex of the baby is unknown but we will find out (2 weeks). AND the baby will be half Mexican/half Caucasian. My friend said that's while she immediately thought of us.